When Amy Bailey, a communications strategist, read Sheryl Sandberg’s “Lean In,” the year was 2013. The #MeToo movement hadn’t exploded yet, highlighting the abuses that women face in the workplace. The term #girlboss was not trending. And the question of how Facebook could influence democracy was not central.
“It gave me a boost of courage,” said Ms. Bailey, 46, who lives in Green Bay, Wisconsin, referring to Ms. Sandberg’s book. “It struck this feminist chord in me — if you just push harder, if you just ask for more, someone will notice.”
Nearly ten years later, Mrs. Bailey said she’d gotten no raise, pumped milk into her office smoking area, and cut back on her professional aspirations, recognizing the challenge of balancing work with motherhood. She has also delved into the Lean In philosophy that taught her that a little spice was all she needed for a successful career.
“It’s just not true,” she said. “No one ever tapped me on the shoulder for doing more and being better prepared.”
On Wednesday, Ms. Sandberg announced that she was stepping down from her position as chief operating officer of Facebook’s parent company, Meta — the top position that made her one of the most prominent women in corporate America. She had already been employed for five years when she published “Lean In,” and her unique role and success in Silicon Valley helped amplify the book’s message.
For many women, ‘Lean In’ is a bible, a roadmap to business. Many others have come to understand its limitations, or see it as a symbol of what is wrong with applying individualized solutions to the systemic problems holding women back in the workplace, especially women of color and low-income women. . And Ms. Sandberg’s departure is a moment for all those readers to reflect on how ‘Lean In’ shaped their careers.
When “Lean In” came out in 2013 and landed on the bestseller list and put Ms. Sandberg on the covers of Time and Fortune, only 4 percent of Fortune 500 CEOs were women. The book sold over four million copies in five years. The Lean In Foundation supported the creation of thousands of Lean In circles where women, especially those at the beginning of their careers, used Ms. Sandberg’s advice as a guideline.
The book told women to embrace their ambitions and not sideline themselves for fear that boardrooms weren’t built specifically for moms, if at all.
“I still notice that sometimes I am talked about and that men sitting next to me are not taken into account,” Ms Sandberg wrote. “But now I know how to take a deep breath and hold my hand up. I have learned to sit at the table.”
Her message was clear: Set up a chair. The text suggested that any reader could achieve a version of what Ms. Sandberg had — throwing her shoulders back, asking for a raise, weaning people off.
Many were inspired. Molly Flanagan, a workplace coach who was a member of a Lean In circle in New York, recalled that reading the book prompted her to take a competitive exam at work.
“I was at a point in my career where I was trying to navigate the ranks of my organization,” she said. “Things like claiming my seat at the table were really important development pieces for me.”
But it was also abundantly clear to many readers of “Lean In” that what had enabled Ms. Sandberg to climb the corporate ladder went far beyond sheer will. She was a white Harvard-educated woman months away from one of the world’s youngest billionaires ever.
“It’s hard for black women to lean forward when you’re not even in the room,” says Minda Harts, 40, a consultant and the author of “The Memo: What Women of Color Need to Know to Secure a Seat at the Table”. † She recalled being frustrated when her white colleagues recommended Mrs. Sandberg’s book to her. “I thought, it’s impossible to break into Sergey Brin’s door and tell him, ‘I don’t have a parking space.'”
Feminist thinker bell hooks put it bluntly in a 2013 review. “Sometimes Sandberg reminds readers of the old stereotypes about used car salesmen,” wrote Ms. Hooks. “She’s pushing her product and she’s pushing it well.”
And for many women, Ms Sandberg’s book, focusing on how the individual should change rather than the workplace in general, didn’t just offer useless advice on tackling inequality. It was a fundamental reflection of the problem.
“Without any structural changes, you’re leaning on low-income women of color to support this understated fantasy,” says Koa Beck, 35, author of “White Feminism: From the Suffragettes to Influencers and Who They Leave Behind.”
Or, to put it another way, a corporate lawyer’s ability to hire multiple nannies so she can work late into the night on her way to partner wouldn’t solve childcare problems for everyone else.
Some, especially younger women, were direct critics of Ms. Sandberg’s book, which the author called “a sort of feminist manifesto.” Others have sharpened their critiques over time — either because their own life experiences made it clear that sounding a little louder in meetings wouldn’t catapult them to the top of a male-dominated corporate sphere, or because they realized who made that strategy. easiest to serve.
“Society has moved on, we are now paying a lot more attention to the structural disadvantages women face — everything from sexual harassment to childcare to no nationally paid maternity leave,” said Katha Pollitt, a feminist columnist, who recalled many friends, and her own daughter, had found that “Lean In” was full of wise advice when it came out. “People have just transitioned from seeing women’s work lives as defined by their own feelings.”
Katherine Goldstein, 38, started a Lean In circle with friends in 2013. Three of the seven members were motivated by the book to ask for a raise, and were given one.
“It felt like a great blueprint to think about my life in the future,” said Ms. Goldstein, author of The Double Shift newsletter.
But after Ms. Goldstein gave birth, struggled to raise a child with health problems, and then lost her high-profile media job, the book’s advice began to sound hollow. “It’s useful to me now as an intellectual foil of what I no longer believe and don’t want to be,” she said.
Despite all the reaction ‘Lean In’ eventually provoked, there were millions of women who saw some of their own potential in Ms. Sandberg’s megawatt success.
“I always call it a before-after situation,” said Rachel Sklar, an entrepreneur who served on the launch committee that promoted “Lean In” before its release. “It became an abbreviation for a problem that was previously known and not mentioned.”
For Ms. Sklar, some of the criticism of Ms. Sandberg since the publication of her book has been exaggerated. “Male business leaders write books all the time and they just fly under the radar about how their books stand the test of time,” Ms Sklar said.
And Ms. Sandberg faced even more criticism as the public perception of her company faded. When Facebook came under fire during the 2016 election for its role in spreading misinformation, part of the public turned to Ms. Sandberg, who was responsible for the policy and security team. In 2018, she was accused of being part of the fallout from the data breach scandal involving Cambridge Analytica. In addition, there is research indicating that Instagram, which Meta owns, has had toxic effects on the mental health of teenage girls. Some felt that Ms. Sandberg’s public message remained too focused on individual ambition and achievement, rather than the social value of the company she ran.
“Not everything has to be granted,” says Rosa Brooks, 51, a professor in the law school at Georgetown University, adding that Ms. Sandberg’s tenure as director raised deeper questions about her workplace philosophy. “It’s not just ‘How do I pass the workplace conditions?’ but ‘How do I change the workplace and make it a positive force?’”
Last month, when a draft ruling revealed the Supreme Court’s intent to overthrow Roe v. Wade, Ms. Sandberg issued a statement mourning the loss of women’s access to abortion.
“This is a scary day for women across the country,” Ms Sandberg wrote on Facebook. “Every woman, wherever she lives, should be free to choose whether and when she becomes a mother.”
For some women, the post was another sign that Ms Sandberg’s personal philosophy would have limited impact, and that a focus on broader policy change was more urgently needed. There was no support for abortion access from Ms Sandberg’s company. Weeks later, a recording from The Verge even revealed that a Meta executive had told employees not to talk about abortion on the company’s internal platform, called Workplace, due to the divisiveness of the topic. Meta did not respond to a request for comment.
For ten years, Ms. Sandberg’s approach to gender in the workplace had influenced her proponents and critics alike.
Ms. Harts, the workplace consultant, was excited by Ms. Sandberg’s writing. She decided to make a script for women like herself who didn’t see themselves in ‘Lean In’. Seven years ago, Ms. Harts founded The Memo, a career development organization that supports women of color. Since then, she’s received a torrent of emails, including from black women who work at Meta, thanking her for advice that felt more relevant to their lives.
“The idea that you can work the hardest and get ahead isn’t always the same for women of color,” said Ms. Harts.
And now even Mrs. Sandberg is on hiatus. In a Facebook post on Wednesday announcing her resignation, she said her next period would be to get married this summer and focus on her children, philanthropy and other pursuits that may not have been mapped out as carefully as the previous ones. chapters of her career.
“I’m not quite sure what the future will bring,” she wrote. “I’ve learned that no one ever is.”
